"We are the Unseen"
Hey mom, it's me your little girl Sarah. I seen auntie Lisa the other day, when I was getting in the car to turn a trick. Too embarrassed to chase her down and ask for money to help pay the rent. Uncle David told me "NO." I would just put it in my veins, rent is due and it seems like it's less than 52 hours in a week nowadays.
Pops it's me! Your all-star power hitter. Your All-American go get getter. Mama's little boy is now a homeless grown man. Dad just hit the button for yes to accept a collect call from an inmate named Stan. "WE ARE THE UNSEEN" .
Who I Could Have Been
Now that your mind is my canvas, your imagination are the paint brushes, and my unspoken words that you hear resonate with the strokes. The colors of the emotions will be seen in dreams and conversations. You will understand sober dreams with an addiction mind. And comprehend the meaning of curiosity killed the cat "BUT" satisfaction brought it back. Living within city limits but we call it the end of the world. Believing now the Earth is flat and no bigger than the Truckee River.
One child is in CPS and the better part of me is in a dream alone forgotten. My oldest two children I love them to death but the thought of them only deepens the pain of who I could have been. The Elements of Life lock me in the rooms in my mind, it started molesting my thoughts and massaging my temples.
Letting the Old Me Die
Whispering bittersweet promises. The promises of a stable home, financial freedom, and the ability to be a part of my children's life. However, in order to have that I had to do the unthinkable. I had to let the old me die. But how could you kill something that was ready to die? Simple give him something to live for....
I forgot about the past, the present, and the future who was I now in the here and now at this very moment? " I WAS THE UNSEEN".
Hello, my name is Donald Griffin. Alcoholic, addict, and formal criminal. Resident of Gateway Inn. I'm here to share my experience, strength, and hope. How it was, what it was like, and how it is now. I suffer from a mutated mental illness that has no known vaccine.
My Soul Misplaced
One day, doctors and scientists may find a cure but have not done so yet. Self-well and organized programs are our only resource of remedy. This mental illness is passed through generations. Genetically, environmentally, peer pressure, and the selfish reasons of not wanting to be alone. If not addressed and addressed violently it will procreate. Transmitting. Doubts, depression, jails, death, and institutions. My mental illness that is shared with so many others is "Alcoholism."
During this period of my life long illness I resemble: "THE UNSEEN." The homeless and addicted race. Lost, shattered, confused, and moving in a silent state of mind. The inner standing of my self echoed a sarcasm tone. Mentally dehydrated, my physical appearance deflated, and soul misplaced. C.P.S motion for change of custody. Our son was born with the full-blown addiction and habits of his parents. "WE" welcomed him in to the world with withdrawals and surgery. Unable to keep the high rent paid and ourselves in order we lost custody.
A Death and More Drugs to Fill the Void
More drugs came into play to fill the void. October 13th. The state of Nevada ruled her death as an overdose. I say she died from a broken heart. She was reaching out and asking for help but again she was " THE UNSEEN."
My heart wouldn't let me lose her no matter how hard I tried I just couldn't say goodbye and lose her. I played that song over and over again. No amount of drugs could get me to the point I needed to be. I could have drunk a lake the size of Texas and still be mentally sober. Without cause, care, nor understanding, homelessness took an agreement in my new lifestyle.
The Shelter, the River, the Hospital and Jail
Entering the men's shelter, a third world country inside the greatest country in the world.... Was overflowing their capacity with human beings... Unbathed bug-infested homeless man sleeping in an uncomfortable sitting position at the same tables we were to eat at. Sleeping in this position, blood is unable to flow throughout the legs... causing swollen ankles and blood clots. Both mentally and physically wounded.
The river became home. No longer under natural law and order. The human in me slowly started to disappear. I became "THE UNSEEN."
May 1, 2017, along the river, I was beaten and robbed by two human beings surviving by the only means known to "US." I suffered from a broken jaw. Surgery lasted two and half hours. Metal plates were placed by my temple, and chin. I spent eoght days in the hospital.
Thinking and recovering. Just another war story to add to the list. No housing, section 8 frozen, and the usual from the city:"out of money." Back to the shelter I go. Victim of crime paid my rent for three months. And yet unable to kick the alcohol and drug habits. I went to my home away from home, jail for possession.
Coming out of a More than Two Decade Coma
5’2" Grey and brown haired public defender. Told me judging by your record you cannot stay clean or sober. Did the jail time and refused the 1-year program. Now I have tried to stop for my kids, mama, and girlfriend. I even said I can stop if I wanted to but I never wanted to. She had just as much faith in me as I had in myself " NONE"
What else did I have to lose. Besides the three free months rent paid. S*** I was beaten mentally, physically, emotionally, and deep down inside I wanted the help. During this year program, I mentally and physically detoxed. I had come out of a coma and it was 23 years later. I knew who I was when I was drinking and drugging. But I had no idea who I was becoming.
I got rid of people, places, and possessions. The things I thought I knew I forgot. I had to find my identity first, then get my mind right, and I went out and got my life right.
Reborn and Pleading for All of Us to See
I-AM reborn with new relationships with my children, a job I had for a year, never missing a day. We need to see programs developed, housing for families and individuals, help for the kids that are caught in the crossfire. I pray that "WE" feed the hungry, shelter the homeless and heal "US" who are sick and addicted.
No family, nor person should ever have to live this way in the greatest country in the world. I - AM "WE THE PEOPLE" THE UNSEEN.
Now your imagination had painted you a clear vision on what once was your empty canvas. Let your emotional colors be seen in your dreams and in conversation. That way when you walk passed "US" "WE" would no longer be "THE UNSEEN" If you have any questions the next time you're out just ask the next person you SEE!